


Choosing Them

by NeoDiji



Series: Choosing Each Other [2]
Category: Code Geass
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Canon Compliant, Fluff, Healthy Relationships, M/M, OTP Working Together In Battle, Romance, Secret Revelation, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Warm and Fuzzy Feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-21
Updated: 2020-10-09
Packaged: 2021-03-06 14:27:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 15,315
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26030392
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NeoDiji/pseuds/NeoDiji
Summary: Suzaku has declined knighthood for the sake of their relationship, and now Lelouch needs to handle his two warring priorities. Sequel to Choosing Him.
Relationships: Kururugi Suzaku/Lelouch Lamperouge | Lelouch vi Britannia
Series: Choosing Each Other [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1869787
Comments: 105
Kudos: 200





	1. Hidden Histories

**Author's Note:**

> I do not own Code Geass or make profit from writing this fanfiction.

Lelouch relived, for the zillionth time, the moment Suzaku had chosen him.

Suzaku had chosen Lelouch over knighthood. Over his status. Over—to some extent—Britannia.

Lelouch’s heart reeled from the implications all over again, as if this were the first time Suzaku was voicing his choice. Suzaku wasn’t in front of Lelouch right now—off training as an enemy pilot probably, but at least not as Euphy’s personal knight—but Lelouch certainly would never expect Suzaku in the Black Knights’ mobile base parked out in the ghettoes.

It was one thing for Suzaku to choose Lelouch, his childhood friend-turned-lover.

It would be quite another for Suzaku to choose Zero, the enemy he hated with the same level of vitriol that Lelouch himself reserved for his father.

Thoughts still spinning, Lelouch forced himself to tune into the present moment even as his heart ached with longing for his new boyfriend. Diethard was arguing that Suzaku was still a threat and should therefore still be assassinated, however with the knighthood status gone and both Ohgi and Tohdoh still firmly demanding Suzaku’s life be spared to the point that even Rakshata agreed, Lelouch allowed himself to relax. Suzaku’s life was safe.

Suzaku’s life was _his_.

His to protect. His to love.

Grateful that the mask concealed any blush he could feel rising on his face, Lelouch cleared his throat and waited for his underlings’ undivided attention. “I will deal with Suzaku personally,” he announced, closing the argument. “It may take some time, but consider him one of my top priorities.”

It wasn’t a lie.

Lelouch withheld a sigh, getting drawn into his own looping thoughts once more. He honestly had no idea how to handle Suzaku-as-an-enemy.

And how did Suzaku-as-an-enemy connect to Suzaku-as-a-lover?

Since Suzaku had chosen Lelouch over his own goals, did that mean it was only fair for Lelouch to do the same? Should he disband the Black Knights? Give up the mask of Zero? Cease crushing Britannia?

Lelouch loved Suzaku with every fiber of his being, but…

And therein lay the question.

 _Was_ there a ‘but’?

There _shouldn’t_ be a ‘but.’

There was no room for conditions of this magnitude in their relationship.

But…

The movement Lelouch had started was a lot bigger than Suzaku’s personal knighthood, even with all it represented. There were people counting on him to be Zero, to save them. His plans would result in a new and better world order. He’d already accomplished so much…

“Zero?”

Lelouch snapped to attention, noticing his Black Knights inner circle giving him concerned glances.

“Just thinking,” Lelouch said hastily, jumping to his feet. “I will continue to work on the Kururugi issue. Carry on with your orders.”

As he ascended the stairs, almost stumbling on some steps due to his lack of focus, he kept turning ideas over in his mind. C.C. would advocate—again—that Lelouch use his Geass on Suzaku, but Lelouch knew that Geass, like conditions, had no place in their romance. Vowing again to never use the power on his boyfriend, Lelouch entered his private room of operations.

“Would it be enough to simply reveal myself to him and work through whatever happens?” Lelouch mused, tapping his fingers against the mask.

C.C. lay on the couch, hugging her Pizza Hut plushie. “You could always try, and then reset things with Geass if it goes poorly,” she suggested, automatically knowing what he was talking about. It was all he’d been able to focus on for days, after all, and she was probably sick of his indecision.

“No,” Lelouch barked, flopping into his seat. “I refuse to use Geass even as a back-up. Not on Suzaku.”

“Then you might lose him,” C.C. pointed out, turning her unnerving gaze on him. “Are you prepared for that?”

No, no Lelouch was certainly not prepared for that.

He’d just started sinking his toes into an impossible romance.

He couldn’t lose Suzaku.

Not to Euphy, and not because of Zero.

But continuing to lie was cruel, especially after everything Suzaku had given up for the sake of their love.

Unmasking himself, Lelouch inhaled deeply. The fresh air helped, and a sense of hope swelled in his heart alongside his expanding lungs. “I will tell him the truth,” he vowed steadily, eyebrows furrowed as he glanced at C.C., warning her from making any smart comments. “And use my Geass on _other_ people to do damage control if necessary.” He wouldn’t know details until Suzaku reacted. It was risky, but everything worthwhile was.

And Suzaku was definitely worthwhile.

-+-

Suzaku bounced slightly in his cockpit seat, yearning to go home to Lelouch. As it was, he was stuck at work for the foreseeable future, and every nerve buzzed with anticipation. If only he could let out some of his pent-up feelings by piloting—

“So, how are things going with your boyfriend?” Euphy asked, appearing suddenly out of nowhere on the raised platform and plopping gracelessly into a seat next to Suzaku’s open cockpit.

With a start, almost pressing some buttons, Suzaku rubbed the back of his neck and wished his blush would go away. “Uh, g-great,” he stammered, looking around for anything to distract him.

On the bottom floor, Euphy’s newly-appointed Britannian knight, Charmelle Finlay—a previous warrant officer from Area 11’s Hokkaido Zone Military District D—was gazing in awe at the Lancelot as Lloyd literally sang of its amazing abilities. Cecile was pressing a hand to her forehead, looking like she’d rather be anywhere else.

In other words, aside from the visiting royalty, it was a typical day in the ASEEC university hangar.

“We haven’t had much of a chance to talk about him,” Euphy said with a pout, crossing her arms over her chest. Behind her, a computer beeped as if to accentuate her words. “At my old school, I would always talk with my friends about their love lives. I miss that.”

Suzaku turned back to her with a guilty smile. When she put it like that…

Euphy lifted her chin hopefully, her eyes bright.

Suzaku sighed in defeat, fiddling with the Lancelot’s key in the ignition. “He’s…fantastic,” he said in a low voice, hoping Lloyd and Cecile would be preoccupied with the inactive Lancelot for awhile yet. They’d been beyond shocked when he’d announced to them that he’d politely declined knighthood for the sake of his boyfriend, and he didn’t want to give them any more ammunition. Lloyd’s exact words had been: “There must be a critical piece malfunctioning in Suzaku’s brain” and “Shouldn’t we run some tests?” Cecile had fretted that maybe Suzaku had hit his head during their most recent Knightmare battle. To this day, they still didn’t fully believe what he’d done. No, they did not need to overhear him talking about his boyfriend. It was bad enough that he was roped into this whole madness with Euphy.

Waving her hand for more, Euphy nodded encouragingly. Expectantly.

Suzaku inwardly sighed, knowing she wasn’t satisfied with two words. “He’s smart and kind and…and… _perfect_. I mean, except for his faults, which he definitely has—I mean, he’s only human, even if he doesn’t seem like it most times...” Looking down, trying in vain to control his squirming, he added, “I don’t really know how to describe him, but he’s the best match possible for me. I really love him.”

With a wistful sigh, Euphy sank lower in her seat and lazily propped her cheek on her fist. “He sounds wonderful, Suzaku. What’s his name?”

Suzaku’s heart thundered to a stop. “Uh, what?” he croaked.

“His _name_ ,” Euphy repeated with a light laugh.

Suzaku looked down, suddenly hoping Cecile had managed to tear Lloyd away from the Lancelot after all. No such luck. He glanced at Euphy out the corner of his eye. “That’s a secret,” he finally said, realizing he sounded suspicious but not knowing what else to say. He couldn’t let Lelouch be discovered! Fidgeting, he considered closing his cockpit to end the conversation, but he knew that would be rude—and only delay the inevitable.

“Oh, I do love mysteries,” Euphy said, clapping her hands delightedly. “Okay, clue time! Is he an Eleven or Britannian?”

Suzaku swallowed another sigh, realizing that she wouldn’t give up. He ran his fingers idly along rows of buttons, more so that he’d have something to do as he gave in to her question. He wondered if one of them would get him out of this mess. “He’s Britannian.”

Euphy cocked her head, her brow wrinkled in thought. “Britannian, so…does he go to Ashford Academy too?” She perked up even more. “Do you have a picture?”

Suzaku hurriedly leapt to his feet, swaying in the raised cockpit, as his heart pounded against his ribcage. “You know, I think they might need me down there,” he said, gesturing to Lloyd and Cecile.

“You can visit with the princess!” Cecile called out, giving Suzaku no choice but to sit again.

Euphy looked an odd mix of triumphant and resigned, her eyes swirling with conflicted feelings. “Okay, I won’t dig anymore in that direction. How did you two meet?”

Suzaku nervously tapped his fingers against his leg as he looked off to the side. The thought struck him that ordinarily he’d enjoy gushing about Lelouch, the most amazing part of his life, to one of his best friends—had he not had to keep quiet about Lelouch’s true identity. If only he could shout about Lelouch from the rooftops! Alas, he had to be careful. “We were childhood friends. We, uh, lived near each other.”

“That’s so cute!” Euphy gushed, eyes shining with interest. “The best romances are built on strong friendships. Now onto the juicy stuff. Is he a good kisser?”

Suzaku shrank back in his seat, eyes wide and face on fire. “E-Euphy!”

“ _Well_?”

Suzaku couldn’t help but squirm again, embarrassment heating his blood. “H-he’s learning, but that kinda makes it more special between us…”

Euphy squealed with laughter. “Oh, that’s adorable! Does he live up to your fantasies?”

“Euphy!” Suzaku groaned in a low tone, risking another look at the activity around the Lancelot’s feet. Activity he’d rather be partaking in than gossiping about his boyfriend to one of his best friends—even though a secret part of him still thrilled at the opportunity to rave about Lelouch, even if only limitedly. Fingers busy playing with the Lancelot’s key again, he said firmly, “He’s better than any fantasies because he’s _real_.”

“True,” Euphy agreed with another enthusiastic nod. She leaned in, asking in a sly tone Suzaku never would have expected from her, “How far have you gone with him?”

“ _Euphy_!” Suzaku shrieked, pressing against the backrest of his chair. Ignoring Cecile’s look of concern (Lloyd was too invested in the Lancelot to notice), Suzaku said, “Some things aren’t for an innocent princess to know, okay?!”

Rolling her eyes, Euphy leaned closer yet and whispered conspiratorially, “Suzaku, I’m not as naïve as you think. I know about _sex_.”

Suzaku gaped at her, his mouth flapping. The Lancelot’s key slipped through his fingers.

“Of course,” Euphy said thoughtfully, holding her chin, “I don’t know much about _gay_ sex.”

“ _EUPHY!_ ”

“I could always ask my older brother Schneizel for tips, if you needed—”

“ _That’s not necessary!_ ”

Giggling into her hand, Euphy tilted her head. “Okay, okay. You sure are touchy.”

“Look, we haven’t had sex!” Suzaku hissed, his eyes darting left and right. “We only recently got together—we’re not there—you know what?” he asked, cowering from the image of Lelouch’s disapproving face in his mind’s eye. “This is nobody else’s business anyway! He’d kill me for talking about our private matters like this!”

Looking duly chastised, Euphy sat back and stared him straight in the eye. “You’re right, Suzaku. I went too far. I’m sorry.”

With a slight huff, Suzaku folded his arms across his chest. “All things considered,” he continued, his tone full to the brim with longing, “I can’t imagine kissing anyone else.”

A soft look stole across Euphy’s face. “That’s really sweet, Suzaku. I’m happy for you.”

“…Thanks.” Suzaku cleared his throat, waving at the newly-appointed knight. “How are things going with Major Finlay?”

Euphy’s whole body drooped, looking disappointed to be off the subject of Suzaku’s boyfriend, but she dutifully answered, “She’s a fantastic knight. Just the other day, she accompanied me to Shikine Island to greet a surprise visitor. It turned out to be my big brother Schneizel!”

Suzaku almost got whiplash as he jerked his head up to stare at her. “The Prime Minister of Britannia?”

Giggling again, Euphy nodded. “He’s the head of the ASEEC unit here, you know, so you’re going to meet him at tonight’s dinner on the Avalon. We came to collect you.”

Panicking, doused in a cold sweat, Suzaku said, “I-I’m not ready to meet Prince Schneizel! Just like that!” He’d heard enough stories from Lelouch and Nunnally. What if he let something slip?

“You’ll be fine,” Euphy reassured him. “You are the ace pilot of the Lancelot, after all. He’s already impressed with you.”

Nodding, Suzaku breathed in deeply. Resigned. He’d just have to be on his guard. “Okay then.”

“You can relax, you know,” Euphy said, laying a gentle hand on his arm. “I know he must sound intimidating because of his titles, but Schneizel is a truly kind person. You have nothing to be afraid of.”

Suzaku nodded again, thought of Lelouch, and steeled himself.

-+-

“I need to prepare,” Lelouch announced, looking to C.C. It was quiet in his personal Black Knights quarters, with the future closing in on him. He needed to get this right, and he needed to clear all tasks at hand. This was one of his most important personal missions. “I’ll buy you extra pizza for the next month if you help me.”

“Deal,” C.C. agreed, sitting up on the sofa. The lightbulb flickered. “What do you want me to do?”

“Roleplay with me,” Lelouch said, taking a seat opposite her in his rolling chair. His chessboard sat at the ready. “You’re Suzaku. I’m me. Okay?”

“Sure,” C.C. said, flipping her hair. “Get on with it.”

Lelouch took a deep breath, visualizing his boyfriend’s face. “Suzaku, there’s something important you should know about me. It’s only fair. I’m…” He took a moment, his pulse spiking as he worked himself up to the full confession—even in this mock scenario. “I’m Zero.”

“Bang,” C.C. said, pretending to fire a gun at him with her finger. “You’re dead.”

Immediately, Lelouch scowled. “Suzaku wouldn’t do that.”

“But it’s your worst fear,” C.C. said matter-of-factly. “And now it’s out of the way. Next.”

“Suzaku,” Lelouch said, trying to get back in the right state of mind. “I know I’m going to have a lot to explain, so please bear with me. The first thing you should know is…” He inhaled deeply, letting his confession out on the exhale: “I’m Zero.”

“I don’t want to hear any more,” C.C. said coldly, her golden gaze blank. “I hate Zero, which means I hate _you_. I’m going to turn you in to the Britannian authorities.”

Lelouch scowled harder, his nostrils flaring. “C.C.!”

“What?” C.C. asked, blinking owlishly at him. “I’m just going through the worst-case scenarios with you. Isn’t that what you wanted?”

Lelouch idly tapped his black king chess piece against the board, the repetitive motion helping him think. “Suzaku wouldn’t turn me in right away,” he mused, brow furrowing in concentration. “At least…” he added, tapping his chin, “I don’t think he would. He’d talk with me before deciding on a course of action.”

“Fine, fine,” C.C. said, rolling her eyes. “Go on.”

“Suzaku,” Lelouch said, his voice a bit softer than his previous attempts, “I love you, and I’ve been hiding something important from you that I think you should know about. The truth is…” He braced himself again, hoping the words would get easier with practice. “I’m Zero.”

C.C. nodded slowly, shifting in her seat. “Okay. But I fight against Zero.”

“I know that.” Lelouch clenched the fabric of his pants. It was hard enough with C.C., but how much worse could it go in real life?

“Then what should we do?” C.C. imitated Suzaku’s clueless nature perfectly.

Lelouch tilted his head. “I’d like for you to join the Black Knights,” he said quickly. “Or at least quit the Britannian military.”

“You know I can’t do that because I’m a stubborn idiot,” C.C. said in her best Suzaku impression.

Lelouch frowned at C.C.’s laced insults, injured on behalf of his boyfriend. “I don’t want to fight you,” he said, focusing on the task at hand. “I can’t risk you getting hurt in all this.”

“But I have a stupid death wish,” C.C. countered, flapping her hand.

Frowning harder, fighting a headache, Lelouch continued, “I want to work through this with you. What do _you_ think we should do?” Maybe he’d get somewhere by giving Suzaku a voice—

“We should probably break up,” C.C. answered at once, twirling her hair, “because my foolish ideals are worth more than our budding gay romance.”

“C.C.!”

“ _What_?”

-+-

Suzaku was finding it hard to focus in the massive, decorated dining hall aboard the flying Avalon airship. The room was draped in splendor he’d rarely seen, let alone been invited to partake in. Feeling out-of-place, he forced himself to straighten to attention as Prince Schneizel approached.

“I was under the impression for a day that you were to be my dear little sister’s personal knight,” Prince Schneizel said by way of greeting, nodding to Suzaku. “Though that didn’t turn out to be the case, it is still an honor to meet the young man who has consistently helped both my sisters with the unrest in Area 11.”

Suzaku’s jaw dropped, and he had to will himself to act professionally. “Th-thank you, Your Highness. The honor is mine.”

With another curt nod, Schneizel moved on to greet the others. Cecile and Major Finlay almost swooned as he kissed their hands. That done, he took a seat at the head of the table and motioned for everyone else to do the same. “I’m glad you all could join me for dinner.”

“Schneizel,” Viceroy Cornelia said, dipping her head. “How wonderful it is that you’re here; however, I would have preferred you’d waited until _after_ we had Area 11 under complete control.”

Smiling congenially, Schneizel cocked his head. “I have my own affairs to attend to that happen to be in this vicinity. Our latest Knightmare project, the Gawain, has somehow been stolen, but as soon as we locate and retrieve it, I can carry on with my business. Don’t worry. I won’t get in the way of your governing, dear sister.”

“That’s not what I meant—”

“I’ll be quick. It’s hard enough being in this land,” Schneizel continued, glancing between Euphy and Cornelia. “I don’t know how you stand it.”

“What do you mean?” Cecile asked—before quickly covering her face with both hands, a bright blush peeking out from between her fingers. “Please forgive my rudeness, Your Highness!”

Schneizel chuckled. “Don’t fret, Miss Cecile. I merely meant…not only was Clovis murdered here, but our siblings Lelouch and Nunnally died in this land as well. I loved Lelouch the most of all my brothers, so as you can imagine…”

As Cecile murmured her sincerest apologies, Suzaku swallowed and shifted in his seat, suddenly unable to control himself. His breathing sped up, like there wasn’t enough air in this massive dining hall crowded with people and memories.

Euphy shot him an odd look.

Following her gaze, Schneizel asked, “Are you quite all right, Warrant Officer Kururugi?”

Thinking fast, Suzaku took a sip of water. “Uh, yes,” he managed, his voice barely above a croak. “The truth is, I remember Le—Prince Lelouch and Princess Nunnally. They stayed on my family’s property before the war.” That, at least, was historical fact.

Euphy’s eyes welled with tears, Cornelia straightened in her seat and looked at Suzaku for the first time with any real interest, and Schneizel nodded knowingly. “Ah, yes. That does sound familiar.”

“We were close,” Suzaku continued, feeling the weight of everyone’s eyes on him, “but we got separated during the war.”

Schneizel’s eyes narrowed thoughtfully, looking a lot like Lelouch himself often did. “I see.”

“Lelouch and Nunnally met a terrible fate,” Cornelia said solemnly, putting down her cutlery with a resounding clang. “Of course, with Nunnally’s handicaps, it must’ve been easy for the Elevens to slaughter them.”

Suzaku winced, horrified at the image—and at the notion that his people would do that.

“Handicaps?” asked Cecile, shooting Suzaku an inquiring look out the corner of her eye.

“Nunnally was blinded and crippled shortly before coming to Area 11,” Cornelia explained. Her eyes glistened with the most emotion Suzaku had ever seen from her.

Euphy sighed, wiping at her cheeks. “Lelouch would have done anything to protect her.”

“It’s too bad they didn’t have personal knights of their own,” Lloyd chirped, ruining the mood. “Maybe then they might be alive!”

“Lloyd!”

Major Finlay cringed, swapping an embarrassed look with Cecile.

Suzaku slid down a bit further in his chair, his heart hammering.

“Enough, Earl of Pudding!” Cornelia thundered, slamming her fist on the table. “I did not come here tonight to have my feelings mocked!”

Schneizel smoothly stood, garnering everyone’s attention. “Enough, dear sister. Earl Asplund has a unique way of putting it, but he does have a point.”

“Schneizel, you—!”

With a soft look, Schneizel raised his glass. “To Lelouch, Nunnally, and Clovis.”

Everyone else followed suit with the toast.

As he sat back down, Schneizel glanced around the table until his eyes lingered uncomfortably on Suzaku. “Onto more lighthearted matters. Warrant Officer Kururugi, I hear you have a boyfriend?”

-+-

“Suzaku,” Lelouch said, his pulse skyrocketing at what he was about to do. He sat across from his boyfriend at the dining room table in the Lamperouge suite, folding his slightly shaky hands. The remnants of their breakfast lay between them. His stomach churned with fear, and he inwardly begged his body to cooperate. Suzaku was not C.C., and if this went wrong… Lelouch forced himself to breathe before beginning his dreaded confession from a place of pure truth. “I love you.”

Suzaku tilted his head, laughter sparkling in his green eyes. “And I love you, Lelouch. What’s up? You don’t normally say it out of nowhere like this…”

Lelouch coughed into his shoulder, taking a moment to listen to the light rain pattering against the windows. “Well, I just want to pave the way.”

“For what?” Suzaku asked, beginning to look more serious. Thunder rumbled in the distance. “Is something wrong? Is it Nunnally?”

“No, no,” Lelouch said hastily, shaking his head. “Nothing like that. It’s just, I’ve been meaning to tell you something, and now that we’re together…” He could feel sweat trickling down the back of his neck. Why was the room so silent? The stormy air was pressing on him, urging him to spit the words out. “And considering you gave up knighthood to be with me, I thought it was only fair…”

Suzaku leaned forward, his gaze intent. “Yeah? I’m listening.”

Lelouch traced the wood patterns on the table before looking again into Suzaku’s eyes. “It’s just, this is controversial. I’ll have a lot to explain. But because I love you, I’m going to tell you anyway…”

Nodding slowly, Suzaku blinked in confusion. “Okay. Whatever you need to say, Lelouch, I’ll listen.”

Slightly reassured, Lelouch took a deep breath and centered himself. Deciding to start with how Suzaku currently viewed Zero, Lelouch said, “Sometimes, people make mistakes. Even if well-intentioned, and even sometimes with disastrous consequences. I think you’d consider…” He interlaced his fingers tighter, trying to hold onto himself while freefalling in doubt. Where were his legendary words? He could spin speeches with his silver tongue on the fly when it came to being Zero, but when it mattered—with Suzaku—his words utterly failed him. “That is, this is really hard to say. I’m—sorry—I’m…”

“Oh!” Suzaku interrupted, drawing into himself with guilt. The rain pounded harder against the windows, the wind rushing outside as the storm picked up. “Mistakes? Is this about how I admitted to the Royal Family last night that we were childhood friends?”

Lelouch’s eye twitched, all thoughts of Zero derailed. “You told them _what_?”

“It would look odd if I _didn’t_ remember you. Since you stayed on my family’s property before the war?” Suzaku reminded him, eyebrow raised. “I was discreet!”

Lelouch sighed, his plans falling through in the wake of this new disaster. Lightning flashed, followed by an immediate clap of thunder. “That may be, but now they’ve had the connection drawn for them and they might scrutinize you closer than ever!”

“Don’t worry. I’ve got this.”

Lelouch’s mind whirled with endless possibilities. All of them catastrophic. “But what if—”

“I’ve _got_ this.”

-+-

Suzaku physically recoiled. “W-what?!”

Cecile leaned forward, murmuring urgently into Suzaku’s ear—in a low voice, even though they were the only ones in the small office room. “Your two friends I met at Ashford Academy! It was _them_ , wasn’t it? The lost prince and princess. It all makes sense.” Her words pitched higher with shock. “You being so…at _home_ …with them, and Princess Nunnally blind and crippled… It was easy to connect the dots.”

Suzaku pulled back and stared at her, the hair on the back of his neck rising as his mind raced in various directions all at once. His feet felt bolted to the floor. He’d never considered this reality, despite Lelouch’s warnings. He’d been so _careful_. Hadn’t he?

“Please, Suzaku,” Cecile said calmly, her blue eyes imploring, “tell me what’s going on.”


	2. Unstoppable

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Suzaku and Lelouch team up to take down the Kyushu Base -- with some added revelations.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do not make profit from writing Code Geass fanfiction.

Suzaku ensured the door was closed before whispering back, “I can’t say. Please don’t put me in that position…”

Cecile leaned back, her eyes wide. “So it’s true?”

“I didn’t say that!” Suzaku panicked.

“But you’re not refuting it!” Cecile pointed out.

Taking a deep breath, Suzaku stood tall. “Look, I didn’t want to do this, but—it’s like this.” He rolled his shoulders, finally bracing himself. “I will always—always—put Lelouch and Nunnally first.”

Cecile gasped, covering her mouth. “He’s the one, isn’t he? The boyfriend you chose over knighthood. It’s Prince Lelouch.”

Suzaku’s eyes widened. His heart pounded in his throat. “I didn’t say that.”

Cecile smiled softly, lowering her hand. “You didn’t need to.”

“You can’t—please don’t say anything either,” Suzaku begged, going so far as to drop to his knees. “I’ve been protecting them for so long.”

Cecile tilted her head to one side, confusion swirling in her eyes. “But Prince Schneizel and the others—”

“Their feelings aren’t as important as Lelouch and Nunnally’s _safety_ ,” Suzaku said firmly, moving forward on his knees. “Their lives may be at stake, and I won’t let anything put them in more danger.”

“What are you talking about?”

“Lady Marianne, their mother, was assassinated within their supposedly safe palace home. Nunnally was caught in that attack, too. They’re safer if the world thinks they’re already dead.”

“Are you accusing the Royal Family of killing one of their own?” Cecile gasped. “And you think they’d go so far again?”

Suzaku hung his head. “It’s Lelouch’s fear, but I don’t blame him for it. There’s enough evidence to suggest…”

Cecile nodded thoughtfully. “I won’t say anything—for now,” she said, hauling Suzaku to his feet. “I’ll at least meet with Prince Lelouch first to get his take on everything.”

“By honoring his wishes, you’re still serving the Royal Family,” Suzaku pointed out.

“Suzaku,” Cecile said, shaking her head fondly, “I’m doing this more out of respect for _you_.”

-+-

Suzaku’s ears were buzzing with nerves so badly that he almost missed Lloyd rambling about the new blaze luminous wings they’d fitted onto the Lancelot, using the same technology present in Prince Schneizel’s floating Avalon airship. Cecile had promised to keep quiet, but what if she let something slip by accident?

At any moment, Suzaku had to be ready to damage control—and how was he supposed to do that?

The pressure mounted, stifling his breathing, as he climbed into the Lancelot for an important solo mission.

He was so focused on making sure Cecile honored their agreement that he barely bothered with anything else, even ignoring Lelouch’s text (“We really need to talk. Please contact me.”). The worst part about infiltrating the Kyushu base was leaving Cecile where he couldn’t keep an eye on her. He trusted her, for the most part, but he’d already messed up…

Suzaku couldn’t even get excited about flying in his Knightmare. He braced himself as he was launched into the dark sky, his breath catching as he fell for a couple seconds—he was always falling, falling—before the blaze luminous wings kicked into gear and he was soaring through the rain clouds. Coming upon his first enemies, he fought, but he was definitely not at his best.

Euphy came online then, reminding him to think of his boyfriend—as if Suzaku could think of anything else!

Maybe his distraction was partly the reason he found himself out of energy and cornered by enemy Knightmares.

As the enemy units targeted him and fired their weapons simultaneously, Suzaku bowed his head and thought painfully of Lelouch.

They wouldn’t get to talk now, among other things. His mind flashed with the future they might have had. At least he’d die to the image of Lelouch’s smile—

Then—out of nowhere—the enemy units were obliterated by another flying Knightmare, using the same Hadron Cannons found on the Avalon.

Suzaku’s mouth fell open in shock, his heartbeat thrumming in his throat.

Before he could say anything, a voice-only transmission came online in the Lancelot.

“I know it must seem odd that I came to your rescue,” said Zero’s distinct voice as he offered the Lancelot a spare energy filler, “but I just couldn’t let anything happen to you, Kururugi.”

-+-

On the Avalon, listening in, Euphy and Cecile shared a surprised glance.

-+-

“Zero?!”

“That is one of my identities,” Zero allowed with a deep chuckle. “Now, I’m going to take out the enemy command center. What will you do?”

Suzaku thought a moment before grinning, gathering his resolve. “Sorry, Zero. But you’re not going to get your wish. I’m going to get them first. My way.”

“How about… _our_ way?” Zero asked, following the Lancelot’s launch into battle.

Bursting through the walls, effortlessly taking down enemy units with Zero’s help as if they’d been covering each other in battle all their lives, Suzaku took the bait. “Our way?”

Zero’s impassioned voice rang through the Lancelot’s cockpit: “I’m saying there’s nothing in this world that you and I can’t do together!”

-+-

Euphy and Cecile shared another stunned look.

-+-

Suzaku’s heart beat its own internal battle, having nothing to do with the actual fighting going on around them, as he realized the full extent of Zero’s confession. “Ah,” he said, trying to reel himself back in, his gut twisting in an onslaught of emotions: anger, mild surprise, disapproval, resignation, pride, and relief at finally having the truth in the open. “So that’s why complement each other so well.”

Zero destroyed a Knightmare dashing towards the Lancelot and carried on as if it had been a mere nuisance. His stolen Knightmare’s arm moved in an erratic pattern then, that didn’t look as if it had anything to do with fighting. “I’ve been trying to think of a way to tell you the truth, especially since we…”

“Yeah…” Suzaku caught on and performed his signature spin-kick move, pushing an enemy unit into the stormy sea. His mind was spinning with other thoughts closer to home. That’s what their almost-conversation earlier would’ve been about, then. At least Lelouch had been trying. That alone was worth everything, making Suzaku feel like flying in a way that not even the blaze luminous wings could imitate.

“But anyway, I couldn’t sit back and let you be killed,” Zero added, causing another explosion that took down a good chunk of the enemy’s forces. Again, his Knightmare struck some kind of odd pose.

Suzaku chuckled, dancing out of range as another squadron of enemies charged him. As soon he’d swerved around them, he realized what else seemed so familiar: Lelouch was sending signals with his Knightmare based on their childhood coded language, indicating where Suzaku should strike next. Genius. Fondly shaking his head, Suzaku joked, “What, can’t live without me?”

“I think you know the answer to that.” Zero’s warm, mechanized tone echoed around the Lancelot’s chamber as his stolen Knightmare took care of another host of problems.

“That’s sweet, Zero. Maybe I’ll make this up to you sometime.”

“You promise?”

Suzaku laughed outright, feeling more at ease. His hands moved over the Lancelot’s controls with even greater precision, confidence flooding him as he teased, “Only if you’re good.”

“For you, I’ll be anything,” Zero shot back, humor still lacing his voice as he used the Hadron Cannon to destroy a tank rolling their way. He took the lead. “Do I get to choose the form of repayment?”

Shaking his head in amused disbelief, Suzaku chuckled again and followed; his low laughter mingled with Zero’s, echoing around his cockpit, their combined feelings giving him strength for his cause. His mind flashed with images of Lelouch, panting and partially undressed on their bed as they explored the newest aspects of their evolving relationship. Warmth pulsed throughout Suzaku’s body, settling in his heart. “I can already guess, and I’m game.”

“Well, that’s excellent news. I look forward to it,” Zero absolutely purred.

-+-

Euphy blinked in astonishment and whispered to Cecile, “Are they…flirting?!”

-+-

Suzaku slashed through another barrier. “Don’t think this lets you off the hook though. What happened to lying about a dangerous double life?”

“Well,” Zero said, shooting aside another round of Knightmares and helicopters, “I’d rather not argue about which of us is the bigger hypocrite.”

Suzaku barked another laugh, swerving around an enemy. “Fair enough,” he conceded, using his slash harken to demobilize an enemy unit. “We’re both guilty.”

“Of a lot of really big things,” Zero added, sounding as sincere as possible while continuing to shoot down opponents. “I know you’ve never agreed with my tactics.”

Suzaku sighed and shook his head, biting back another smile. Enemy reinforcements poured through the smoke of battle. “This really isn’t the time to get into all this, is it?”

Zero chuckled again, low and deep. “Fine. I’ll save it for a more…appropriate…place.”

A shiver raced down Suzaku’s spine at the sensuous way Zero—no, Lelouch—had emphasized his words. Getting lost in the memory of the last time Lelouch had invited him up to his bedroom, Suzaku almost fell into an enemy trap. Luckily, Lelouch—no, Zero—was there to intervene.

“I will say one more thing on the matter for now,” Zero said, hanging back so his Knightmare was level with Suzaku’s. His Knightmare mimicked their code for ‘apology,’ a sign they’d overused in the early days of their forming friendship. “I _am_ sorry.”

Suzaku suddenly found his heart lifting and bursting with feeling, as if Zero’s apology was a new energy filler. “Look, we obviously have a lot to talk about later but—it’s gonna be okay. I’m sorry, too.”

Zero paused a significant moment before shooting Kawasaki’s escape aircraft. “I love you, Suzaku.”

“I love you too…Zero.”

-+-

Cecile shook herself out of a stupor.

“What is it?” Lloyd asked, looking up from the Lancelot’s readings.

Cecile quickly jerked her head. “N-nothing! It’s private!”

Off to the side, Euphy smiled through the tears streaming down her face, clasping her hands to her chest as she murmured, “So Suzaku…and Lelouch are…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope I made you smile. <3


	3. Open and Honest

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The boys talk through some of their issues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to Dragonna for sharing some ideas. <3
> 
> I do not own Code Geass or make profit from writing this fanfiction.
> 
> My apologies if this chapter mimics some of the SuzaLulu talks from _Blackmail_. I have a ~thing~ for these boys talking, just like I have a ~thing~ for secret revelations. I had fun with this though, so I hope you have fun reading it!

Lelouch paced around his bedroom, shooting Suzaku furtive glances every so often. He’d been waiting for Suzaku to come to him ever since they’d taken down the Kyushu base together; he’d had to wait almost three hours, which gave him plenty of time to imagine all kinds of worst-case scenarios. It was probably the fastest Suzaku could escape the Britannian military, all things considered. It didn’t make their looming talk any easier—though Suzaku’s “I love you too, Zero” looping through Lelouch’s mind was always enough to bring him back from the edge.

Suzaku had come in five minutes ago, taken one look at the Lelouch wearing grooves into the floor, and thrown himself face-first onto the bed. Then, finally rolling over with a whole-body shudder, he confessed, “I didn’t want it to be you.” He sucked in his cheeks, then let out a low, mournful whistle. “But I admit it, Lelouch: I’ve suspected you, so I can’t be _too_ surprised.”

“You knew it was me?” Lelouch asked, stopping mid-step.

Suzaku tilted his head. “I wasn’t sure at first, so I convinced myself that it wasn’t true,” he said, staring Lelouch right in the eye. “I really wanted to believe in you. But you were lying to us—to _me_.”

“Yes,” Lelouch agreed with a brisk nod. “I was and I’m sorry.”

“I know you are,” Suzaku said with a heartfelt sigh, his green eyes glittering with empathy. “Just as I’m sorry for lying to you about piloting and—and other things.” His gaze cut towards the wooden floor, and his voice was low and throaty as he admitted, “I’ve made my fair share of heavy mistakes, too.”

Lelouch studied his haunted boyfriend, hunched over on the bed. “You’re speaking about your father.”

“Yes,” Suzaku said, owning up to his past. “I killed him, and I was never punished for it.”

Tossing his head, Lelouch pointed out, “You were a child.”

Suzaku’s head snapped up, eyes wide and anguished. “That makes it worse! But that’s beside the point.”

“That’s why you think the way you do, isn’t it?” Lelouch prodded, sinking into his rolling chair opposite Suzaku. “I’ve been trying to figure you out ever since we reunited, and this is the key.” He leveled a firm yet kind look at Suzaku, hoping his boyfriend would open up to him. “You hate how you gained results using the ‘wrong’ means—killing your father—so you’re trying to make up for that ‘mistake’ by swinging to the opposite extreme.”

Nodding, Suzaku reiterated, “I learned firsthand that gaining results through the wrong means wasn’t worth anything in the end. It just leaves you with a dark emptiness that has nowhere to go.”

“That’s not entirely true, though,” Lelouch said, rubbing his chin. “You’ve been putting that darkness towards your new goal of changing the Britannian system from within.”

Suzaku flinched and clutched a pillow to his chest. “Yeah, but that hasn’t gotten me anywhere. Even personal knighthood, like you explained last week, wouldn’t really change things for the Japanese people as a whole.” He bit back a small moan, tears gathering at the corners of his eyes. “That darkness is getting me nowhere.”

“Then choose a new path,” Lelouch urged, leaning forward. “Stop wallowing in remorse for your past. You don’t have time for that. The world is moving, changing, and you’re letting yourself get left behind.” Rolling his chair closer to Suzaku, he pressed one hand over his heart. “I have darkness inside me, too, and I’m pushing through it for the sake of my goals. I decided after Narita—which was a mistake, by the way: I won’t let my sins stop me from accomplishing what I need to do.”

Suzaku inhaled sharply, his green eyes glinting with trace amounts of newfound understanding. “But what if your sins make the world worse?”

Lelouch shook his head with a small smile at the honest question, at how there was no accusation lacing Suzaku’s tone. It was a step. “No, the world will be better in the end. It will be a tough road, and there will be setbacks, because that is the nature of life. But we can conquer the darkness inside us. And make the world a better place, besides. I have faith in myself, and I have faith in _you_.”

“…I have faith in you, too, Lelouch,” Suzaku said quietly.

This was going far better than his practice talks with C.C. Lelouch offered his boyfriend a soft smile. “I admire how you’ve been trying to do what you’ve thought best, even if I haven’t always agreed with your choices. And,” he said, waiting until Suzaku met his eye, “I don’t think you’ve ever heard this, and you need to know: I _forgive_ you. For everything.”

Tears streamed down Suzaku’s face at the gentle words, and his whole body seemed to collapse in relief from seven years of pent up stress—as if a taut string were cut. “You’re right. No one’s ever forgiven me for murdering my father.” He buried his face in the pillow, and his next words came out a bit muffled. “All the adults, they just figured out the politics involved—but no one, not even Tohdoh-sensei, was ever really there for me, and then the war happened, and…and…”

“And we were separated,” Lelouch added, lowering his head. Pain gushed through him at witnessing his boyfriend’s suffering. “Just when you needed me the most. Oh, Suzaku. I’m so sorry.”

Suzaku shook his head against the pillow, sniffling, “No, no. You needed to do what was best for Nunnally. I don’t blame you at all!”

“Even so, I should have done more!” Lelouch insisted, up and striding towards the bed. Settling down beside Suzaku’s prone form, he added, “We were best friends. I sensed something was wrong. I thought it was just the war, but…”

“But nothing!” Suzaku said, lifting his head. His eyes were red-rimmed and watery as he fixed Lelouch with his gaze. “Do…do you know what Lord Kirihara told me? When he and Tohdoh-sensei found me…that night?” Without waiting for Lelouch to answer, he plunged on, “He said, ‘It’s up to you what you choose. How you want to take responsibility for the blood you’ve shed, and the blood you’re going to shed in the future.’” He started to shake, as if every word cost him. “’But if you cannot do that, then…take your own life here. And if you can’t do that, you have no place in this world. You don’t even deserve to live. Remember that.’” Suzaku slumped, crying harder, and curled into himself. “I’ve…never told anyone that…but it’s always on my mind…every day since it happened…”

Lelouch reeled back, horrified, as he was overcome with the urge to smite down Kirihara—despite the help he’d given the Black Knights through Kyoto. “How dare he?!” Lelouch growled, beginning to rub soothing circles into Suzaku’s tense back. “Saying all of that to a traumatized ten-year-old, when you instead needed comfort, help, and understanding? No wonder you’re so messed up, Suzaku.”

Suzaku flinched but gave a hitched laugh. “Gee, thanks. He was right, though. I did need to find a way to take responsibility.” Propping himself on his elbows, he continued, “That’s why I joined the Britannian Army, to try to make things better. Because he’s right: after what I’ve done, after what I’ve failed to accomplish, I have no place in this world.”

“That’s not true!” Lelouch hissed, clenching his free hand into a fist. “Your place in this world is with me. We’ve already determined that!”

“…That’s where I’d like to be,” Suzaku admitted, sitting up and swinging around to press his face into Lelouch’s shoulder. “Sometimes I don’t think I deserve you, Lelouch.” He gave another hollow laugh. “But then again, after confirming that you’re Zero…” He pulled back, just far enough to look Lelouch directly in the eye. “I think, Lelouch…” His voice dipped low with honesty. “I think we’re more perfect for each other than ever.”

Lelouch nodded and pulled Suzaku into a tight hug. “Agreed.”

Suzaku nuzzled into Lelouch’s neck. “Despite my demons, Lelouch, I love you with all my heart. As I’ve said before, nothing’s changed.”

“Nothing’s changed for me either,” Lelouch said, pressing a light kiss into Suzaku’s soft hair. “But I’m Zero. Can you forgive that?”

“Yes.” Suzaku’s answer was beyond certain—and definitely surprising. Pulling back for some distance, scrubbing at his cheeks, he said, “I forgive you for everything, too. I know you were just doing what you believed to be right. And—there’s still time, Lelouch.” He squeezed Lelouch’s shoulder, somewhere between urgent and comforting. “You don’t have to continue down this path.”

“This isn’t just about me,” Lelouch said, squashing down minor irritation. He’d thought they’d made a breakthrough, but Suzaku was as stubborn as ever. At least they were talking. “There are other people I have to consider. It’s not just my secret, or my movement—you understand that, right?”

The Black Knights had everything riding on Zero. Just like Suzaku’s father’s death was covered up by the authorities; it was never simply Suzaku’s mistake. Everything was so much more complicated than it seemed at first glance.

Lost in thought, Lelouch snapped to attention when Suzaku spoke.

“I get that, and I get why other people follow you. And—Lelouch, I kind of already know, but I want to hear it from you: Why did you become Zero?”

Lelouch sucked in a breath, turning to look his boyfriend directly in the eye. “To save you.”

Suzaku chuckled as he shook his head, a fond smile gracing his face. “Okay, now the _whole_ truth.”

Frowning, Lelouch resettled himself next to Suzaku on the edge of their bed. “You know me too well,” he grumbled. “Fine. I was always planning to be Zero eventually, but it _is_ true that I moved my plans forward to save you from execution.”

Suzaku nodded, following along. “Thank you for that, by the way.”

“You already thanked me.”

Suzaku’s eyes glimmered with feeling. “It’s a pattern now, you saving me…”

Lelouch stole a soft kiss, which Suzaku was quick to return, before murmuring, “You know why.”

“Yeah, and don’t try to brush it off as ‘just returning the favor,’” Suzaku warned jokingly, capturing Lelouch’s lips for a bit longer.

Lelouch nodded against him. This was honestly the best reaction he could have hoped for.

“You’re not done explaining,” Suzaku mumbled against his lips.

“If you’d stop kissing me, maybe we could get to the rest of it,” Lelouch breathed, breaking apart but resting his forehead gently against Suzaku’s. “I do want to save Japan. This has been my home for the last eight years, too, you know?” He drew Suzaku closer still, pressing their palms together. “I want to make a new nation based on equality and justice—everything different from what Britannia stands for. I want to establish a new world order, a world in which Nunnally—and everyone else, especially _you_ —can live happily.” Sliding his fingers between Suzaku’s, he added in a grave voice, “I _also_ want to kill my father and find out the truth about my mother’s murder. Those are my reasons for being Zero.”

Suzaku sighed, pulling back slightly. “Mostly good reasons,” he agreed, the corners of his lips twitching. “Except that I know from personal experience that patricide doesn’t work out.”

“Maybe not in your case,” Lelouch allowed, squeezing Suzaku’s hand. “But my fath—that man is responsible for countless crimes against humanity. He must be brought to justice. Not just for the Areas’ sakes, but for Nunnally’s sake—and mine as well.”

“You’re doing this for revenge,” Suzaku said, seeing right through Lelouch’s pretty words. “That won’t satisfy you in the end, I promise.”

Lelouch shrugged one shoulder, ignoring the opportunity to insinuate just how _Suzaku_ satisfied him. “It’s _partly_ for revenge,” he conceded, keeping to the main point, “but the rest of it rings true as well. The majority of people in this world continue to suffer because of him, and he must be stopped.”

Suzaku nodded, his green eyes hardening. “I agree that he needs to be stopped, but not necessarily killed. So, what if you kept being Zero,” he suggested, causing shock to wash over Lelouch at the turnaround, “but you modified your tactics?”

“I need to use the most effective methods I can utilize against a superpower that’s conquered a third of the world, Suzaku,” Lelouch explained, deadpan.

Suzaku scowled, running his fingers back and forth across Lelouch’s bedspread. “Do you have to kill so many people?”

Lelouch opened his mouth to answer, then closed it again, considering Suzaku’s question. After a tense moment, he offered, “I can _try_ other ways, but I can’t promise…” He trailed off with a sigh before adding pointedly, “After all, it’s not like Britannia’s hands are clean, either.”

“Yeah, that always bothers me when I think too hard on why I joined their ranks,” Suzaku admitted with a flinch. “But I’ve tried to bury my unease for the sake of accomplishing societal reform. My way.”

Lelouch cupped Suzaku’s tear-stained cheek with his free hand. “Then I say to you again,” he said, echoing his own words from mere hours ago, “How about… _our_ way?”

“I want that,” Suzaku said quickly, leaning into Lelouch’s touch and laying his hand atop Lelouch’s to hold it in place. “And I do appreciate your promise to try less violent methods if possible. That’s all I ask,” he said, the hint of a smile on his lips. “Besides, with my help, maybe you won’t have to use drastic measures.”

“Your help?” Lelouch echoed blankly. Hope stirred in his chest.

Suzaku lightly shook his head. “I’m not joining the Black Knights, Lelouch. But I’ll do my best to hold back and not oppose you too much, either.”

“That’s ridiculous,” Lelouch hissed, catching a stray tear with his thumb. “Cornelia will catch on and then you’ll be punished as if you were a Black Knight anyway!”

Suzaku opened his mouth to retort—then closed it as he obviously came to the correct conclusion. “Well then, what do you suggest?”

Lelouch drew Suzaku’s face closer, snatching another kiss. “I still want you to join me.”

“Off the table,” Suzaku said quickly, eyebrows drawing together in a frown, though he soothed the sting of rejection with another few hard kisses. “I already told you I’m not crossing that line, Lelouch. I can’t give up everything I’ve been working towards all these years.”

“So, what?” Lelouch asked, waving his arm around emphatically. “You want to be boyfriends here, and then possibly kill each other out there? I can’t live like that.”

Suzaku shook his head again, this time more frantically. “No, no. Of course not. I can’t live like that either.”

Lelouch leaned forward, desperate. “Then what?”

Suzaku froze for a moment, his green eyes glinting with thought. “Well—what if we both gave it all up?”

“What do you mean?” Lelouch asked, narrowing his eyes.

Suzaku swept a hand through his hair. “What if I dropped out of the Britannian military, and you stopped being Zero, and we both just simply be Suzaku and Lelouch?”

Lelouch considered the possibility, removing his hand from Suzaku’s face. After several moments of intense deliberation, he answered, “While that sounds ideal, I can’t give up on making Nunnally’s utopian world. She comes before everything—even us.”

“Does Nunnally even know?”

“That I’m Zero? Of course not.” Lelouch’s face hardened with set determination. “But I will do anything to make her dream a reality, and so many oppressed people will benefit as well. How can I justify giving up what I can achieve just because I’m a fool in love?”

Fire flashed in Suzaku’s eyes. “Dammit, Lelouch, stop making me fall for you.”

Lelouch chuckled, a bit derisive. “First being Zero was a red flag, and now it’s a turn-on?”

Suzaku waved his hands. “No, what I mean is—your passion. It’s what draws people to you. It’s part of what draws _me_ to you.” With those words, he leaned in, holding out his hands. “And I do understand your drive, to some extent, and part of me always did. I mean, I suspected you as Zero, and I still gave up knighthood to be with you…”

“And it’s only fair that I give up being Zero in return,” Lelouch added with a sigh, reaching out to hold Suzaku’s proffered hands yet again, because they were incapable of letting go of each other. “I’ve been thinking it over, Suzaku. Trust me, I have. I just—”

“No, I don’t want you to give up such a big part of yourself,” Suzaku said, squeezing Lelouch’s hands in his. “That wouldn’t be right either, Lelouch, as much as my heart begs for it.”

Lelouch let out a long sigh. “Then we’re at an impasse, Suzaku.”

Scooting closer, Suzaku let his head drop onto Lelouch’s shoulder. “Not necessarily. I understand your position too, you know,” Suzaku said suddenly into Lelouch’s neck, “even if I don’t agree with your methods. I _know_ you get the results you need to achieve your goals—how the Japanese people need you—and after the way the world’s betrayed you, I can even understand the reasoning behind your actions.” He raised Lelouch’s hand to his lips, gently kissing each knuckle. “You’re hurt on the deepest level, and my heart breaks for you, Lelouch.”

Lelouch raised an eyebrow, trying to ignore the fluttering in his chest, and countered breathlessly, “Says the one still suffering the trauma of killing his own father.”

“There’s no comparing suffering,” Suzaku said wisely, nuzzling into Lelouch’s neck before pulling back for more eye-contact. “Your pain cuts deep every day, too, and you just handle it in a different way than I do.”

Squeezing Suzaku’s hands, Lelouch said, “Yes, I’m productive with my pain. I pour it all into Zero, and I actually get somewhere with my rebellion. But still, everything would be better with you by my side.”

Suzaku smiled softly, holding their joined hands against his heart. “When all is said and done, Lelouch, I can honestly say that I respect you and what you mean to the Japanese people. I _want_ to make things work between us.” Tilting his head, looking determined to reach a viable solution, he suggested slowly, “How about we do what we did tonight? Together we took down the largest base in Kyushu with hardly any effort. How about we discuss each unique situation openly as it comes up and go from there?” His eyes, his posture, everything in Suzaku was nakedly begging. “If we combined our knowledge and our talents, we could do so much. We work so well together…”

“Our way,” Lelouch repeated with wonder. It was what they kept circling back to. It was the best solution for their predicament. “We’ll come up with a plan together for each new set of circumstances,” he pressed, feeling a buzz of excitement light his nerves. “I can do that. There might still be times I feel compelled to do things that go against your moral code, however…”

Suzaku grinned, drawing Lelouch tight against his chest. “But if you’re open with me and you compromise whenever possible, then…I’m okay with that.”

“You are? Truly?”

“That’s what compromise is, Lelouch,” Suzaku said with a fond eye roll, nudging his face closer. “I don’t get everything, and neither do you.”

“That’s not true,” Lelouch shot back, his lips quirking into his familiar smirk. “If I have you, then I have everything I need.” With that, he closed the distance between them, losing himself in Suzaku’s passionate kisses, losing himself in newfound hope, and losing himself in the only future he’d ever want.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, thank you for reading and I hope I put a smile on your face. <3


	4. School Festival

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cecile and Euphy take an active interest in the boys' relationship and things start moving forward to the next stage.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I do not own Code Geass or make profit from writing this fanfiction.

Lelouch rubbed at his brow in irritation as he handled the briefcase of walkie-talkies necessary for coordinating the Ashford Academy school festival. He winced as a flying mallet bounced off his head out of nowhere. This stupid festival—!

“Oh, excuse me— _oh_!”

Lelouch squinted at the blue-haired woman with one eye, her face tugging at his memory. Where did he know her from?

“You’re Suzaku’s… _friend_ ,” the woman said, sounding a little too knowing for Lelouch’s tastes.

Rubbing at his sore head, Lelouch took a fortifying breath. “Yes, and you are?”

“Cecile Croomy. I’m with the Britannian Advanced Special Envoy Engineering Corps.” She drew her finger slowly along the retrieved mallet’s broken handle.

Lelouch nodded, remembering how this woman had come to collect Suzaku that day—right before everything changed.

“I’d like to talk to you,” Cecile said, narrowing her eyes. “ _Your Highness_.”

Lelouch jerked at the title, fear racing down his spine, and then tried to play innocent. “Excuse me?”

Cecile leaned in closer, lowering her voice. “Let me rephrase that. I’d like to talk to you… _Zero_.”

Gaping at this slip of a woman now threatening his cover, Lelouch slid to his feet on autopilot. His heart thudded in his ribcage, threatening to explode all over the damn festival. “Right this way.” With hasty steps, he led her to the inside of the Lamperouge suite, away from all the bustling crazy. Turning around with a recovered suave air, he asked, “What can I do for you?”

Cecile faltered, clutching the mallet still in her hands. “I—I don’t know what to do,” she confessed.

Lelouch sat down at the table and waved her forward to join him. Time seemed to stand still and speed up all at once. Just how much did she know? How threatening was she? What should he do about her? Taking another breath, ready to get to the bottom of his current crisis, he urged, “Go on.”

Just as Cecile took her seat, Suzaku burst into the room with wide, frenzied eyes.

“Lelouch, I saw you and Miss Cecile from across the grounds and—what’s going on?”

Cecile cleared her throat. “Suzaku, I’m glad you’re here, too. This concerns both of you.”

Lelouch swapped a worried look with Suzaku. “She knows.”

Suzaku bit his lip. “Yeah, I—I meant to tell you, she figured out who you really are, and—”

“You _meant_ to tell me? That’s kind of an important thing to forget, Suzaku!” Lelouch snapped, glaring. His jaw clenched for a second, but he let go of the irritation rather quickly. This was Suzaku.

“There wasn’t time! I was called in to help with the Kyushu base, and then things…you know…”

“Enough, boys!” Cecile yelled, her voice cracking like a whip. “I figured out Suzaku’s boyfriend was the lost prince after the dinner with Prince Schneizel. After that, and after hearing you two flirt during battle, it wasn’t hard to put together that Prince Lelouch is Zero.” She looked between the two of them. “For your information, I confiscated the Lancelot’s communications log so no one will find out. Although, Princess Euphemia heard you two live as well…”

Lelouch blinked rapidly, processing Cecile’s confession. “You’re…protecting us?” Relief swamped him, though suspicion still nagged in the corner of his brain—where the ever-present critic watched his life unfold.

“I’m trying to understand!” Cecile said, now holding the mallet to her chest. “I trust Suzaku, but…”

“But you don’t know if you can trust me,” Lelouch finished for her, heaving a sigh. “Fair enough. May I speak to Suzaku for a moment please?”

-+-

Waving Suzaku to his room for privacy, Lelouch swerved to face him head-on. “That woman is a threat to both my secret identities,” he said evenly, looking Suzaku in the eye. “I would normally have two options, neither of which I’m going to use because they would both hurt you.”

Suzaku nodded, folding his arms across his chest—like he was protecting himself from the worst possibilities. “Go on.”

“Option one,” Lelouch said, holding up his index finger, “is to kill her to keep her silent.”

Suzaku nodded again, eyes wide but expression grim with understanding. “I figured that was coming. What next?”

Lelouch tilted his head, steeling himself for another impossible confession. “My second go-to option would be to use my Geass power on her, and order her to stay silent about what she knows.”

Suzaku just stared at him in confused disbelief. “Geass…power?”

Lelouch jerked his chin in a nod. “It’s a special power that lets me control people.”

“And you expect me to believe that.” Suzaku’s voice was expressionless.

Lelouch snorted, initiating his Geass for the barest of moments and letting the crimson glow overlaying his vision flicker away just as quickly. “I would prove it, only I know you and I know you would object to my power being used.” He took a beseeching step forward, explaining, “It has helped me turn the tide in my favor in the past.”

“That’s how you work your miracles?” Suzaku asked, sounding a bit more believing.

Nodding, Lelouch answered, “Yes, indeed. It comes with its own set of rules and restrictions, however—and no, before you ask, I have never and would never use it on you.”

Suzaku nodded slowly. “I’m still trying to understand.”

“Do you remember when we reunited in Shinjuku?”

“How could I forget?”

“That girl from the capsule, C.C., she gave me this inhuman power and I used it to escape the Royal Guard,” Lelouch said, deliberately not going into details. Now wasn’t the time. He’d explain in full to Suzaku later, when they didn’t have a pressing matter to deal with together.

Suzaku tilted his head, eyes searching to the side as he recalled, “C.C. then. I saw her at Narita. She…”

Lelouch hid a wince, remembering what had happened with C.C.’s shock images. “Yes, I’m sorry for whatever she did to you. She was trying to protect me.”

“I can’t blame her for that,” Suzaku said with a long sigh. “We can discuss this more later. For now, what should we do about Miss Cecile?”

Lelouch smiled softly. “I was hoping you would have an idea.”

Suzaku smiled back. “She is already endangering herself to help us. I say we should trust her.”

Lelouch took a deep breath, steeling himself. “Then so be it.”

“Wait, really?”

“You said you trust her, and she _has_ already taken action to prove herself. I will try it your way this time, Suzaku. After all, we did agree to handle situations together.”

Suzaku beamed at him. “I…I can’t believe it…that is, in a good way. A really great way.”

“But,” Lelouch added, leaning closer, “if something from this does backfire, I’ll plan to use my Geass to get us out of it. Do you agree?”

Suzaku nodded curtly, stipulating, “If you don’t kill.”

“With my Geass, I don’t necessarily need to kill.”

Suzaku’s grin could light the world. “Then I agree with your back-up plan. See? You’re not the only one who can bend for a compromise.”

Chuckling, Lelouch leaned close to seal their promise with a kiss.

-+-

“I guess I hadn’t looked at it that way before,” Cecile said, setting the rubber mallet down on the table after they’d explained their ideals, relationship, and compromise. “And if you’re really trying to make the world a better place, then Suzaku’s going to need some back-up on the inside.”

Lelouch tilted his head, his eyes narrowed. “Then, are you saying…”

Cecile offered a small, hesitant smile. “I’ll help you two.”

Suzaku grinned triumphantly. “Thank you!”

Lelouch gave her a polite nod, resisting the urge to use his Geass. His word to Suzaku meant everything. “Very well then. Go forth with our trust.”

Then, as the door to the outside closed behind her, the opposite door opened to reveal Euphy pushing Nunnally’s wheelchair.

Lelouch pushed down panic, noticing how happy both his little sisters looked to be back in each other’s lives. “Euphy!”

“Oh, Lelouch!” Euphy cried, throwing herself into his arms. “I’m so glad!”

“What are you doing here?!”

“I bumped into Nunnally outside,” Euphy explained, still trying to control her tears. “I came to Ashford Academy to see Suzaku. I have a wonderful idea, and Schneizel already approved it!”

Lelouch glared at Suzaku over the top of Euphy’s head, even as he held her close. His heart fluttered with feeling.

“I didn’t—stop looking at me so accusingly!” Suzaku whined.

Euphy pulled back, shaking her head. “It’s not his fault, Lelouch. Anyway, I’m glad we’re all here. I’d love to talk to you about the Special Zone of Japan.”

“What’s the Special Zone of Japan?” Nunnally asked, rolling up to the table. “Sit down and tell us all about it, Euphy.”

Euphy flung herself into a chair, tugging Lelouch with her to the table, and outlined her idea—a small section of Japan returned, where Elevens could be free to be Japanese.

Lelouch’s immediate horror—this would tear apart the Black Knights, destroy everything he’d worked for—faded in the wake of Suzaku’s and, more importantly, Nunnally’s enthusiasm.

“That’s a beautiful plan!” Nunnally chirped, reaching for Lelouch’s hand. “Don’t you think so, big brother? We could always have a safe place to live together. And as a bonus, we could be with Euphy and Suzaku! It’s all I’ve ever wanted!”

Lelouch said nothing, turning over ideas and counter-ideas in his head before expressing his opinion.

Suzaku leaned in to whisper in his ear. “If you and Euphy combined forces, the world would be different…”

Lelouch glanced between the three most important people in his life. “ _If_ we do this,” he said, considering the ultimate compromise, “how will we make it work?”

-+-

Euphy pulled Lelouch to the side, just out of hearing distance of the others. “Can I count on the Black Knights’ support?” she asked, her gaze serious.

Lelouch gaped at her, his heart stuttering to a stop.

“I’ve had a hunch ever since Lake Kawaguchi,” Euphy answered the unspoken question with a mild shrug. “I know I’m asking a lot of you, Lelouch, and I don’t want to ruin your plans. I just think my idea is the best for everyone—and it will be, with _your_ help.”

Slowly, Lelouch nodded. “I’ll amend my plans to help your Special Zone. But not as your subordinate.”

Euphy giggled, pure jubilance. “All right. Oh, and Lelouch,” she added in a slightly louder voice, smiling widely, “one more thing.” She lightly bonked Lelouch on the head with Cecile’s forgotten mallet. “Try to be a better kisser for Suzaku’s sake, all right?”

“Since when did you—”

“I give you my blessing,” Euphy interrupted, smiling brightly. “I expect to be a bridesmaid at your wedding.”

Lelouch choked on his own spit. “Again, what—"

“Keep practicing, Lelouch. You’ll become a better boyfriend for Suzaku in no time. I’m sure of it!”

Shocked into embarrassed silence, Lelouch couldn’t find the right words before Euphy flounced off to inform the press of her idea. She won again, dammit. Slowly, he turned back to Suzaku and Nunnally.

“What was that about?” Nunnally asked, frowning in consternation.

Lelouch shared a heartening look with Suzaku before hedging, “Actually, since this is a day of revelation, there’s something you need to know.” At Nunnally’s inquiring look, Lelouch swallowed down nerves and shared, “I’m Zero.”

“Oh, Lelouch!” Nunnally gasped, turning her head towards Suzaku.

“I only recently found out,” Suzaku said, “but we’ve talked and…we’ve found a way forward.”

Nunnally nodded slowly, taking some time to process the bombshell. “And everything you’ve done has been for me and Suzaku, hasn’t it, Lelouch?”

“Yes, of course.”

“Oh big brother, I love you!”

“You’re not mad?” Lelouch held his breath.

“I’m furious, but I still love you!”

Letting out air in a whoosh, Lelouch acknowledged, “Understandable. I love you too, little sister.”

“And we’re going to move past this, all of us together,” Nunnally vowed, holding out both her hands. “I forgive you.”

Suzaku and Lelouch each took a hand.

“Actually,” Lelouch said, swallowing down another wave of nervous nausea, “there’s another thing we’ve been hiding from you for about a week now, Nunnally. And if we’re going to live together in the Special Zone, then you should know…”

“Lelouch and I are together!” Suzaku blurted before glancing guiltily at the floor.

“You’re always together,” Nunnally said blankly, cocking her head. She seemed more relaxed than she had moments before, as if she was already getting used to the idea of Lelouch being Zero. Had she suspected him, too?

Lelouch pressed the tip of his finger against his forehead in exasperation, closing his eyes. “He means we’re boyfriends.”

Again, Nunnally looked confused. “But you’ve always been boyfriends.”

Lelouch’s eyes popped open, and he stared at Suzaku. “Excuse me?”

“I’ve thought you two were boyfriends this whole time,” Nunnally explained, shrugging one shoulder. “The energy between you two was always so obvious. Wait, do you really mean you just got together a week ago?”

Lelouch looked to the side, his skin prickling with embarrassment. “Yes.”

“Oh.”

There was a pregnant pause, then—

“Lelouch, I thought you were smarter than that. How could you make poor Suzaku wait for you?”

“Yeah, Lelouch?” Suzaku agreed, playfully nudging him.

Lelouch rolled his eyes, sinking into the happy moment. This was his future now—and while he still had a lot to figure out in terms of logistics, he could see prospect where he and Suzaku could be happy together with no secrets or conflicts of interest tying them down, a future with nothing in their way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope I made you smile. <3


	5. Future

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The boys live their best lives in the Special Zone, and Lelouch comes clean to his siblings.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do not own Code Geass or make any profit from writing this fanfiction.

“Kyoto has already vouched support to Princess Euphemia’s Special Zone,” Zero announced from his customary position at the front of the group, waiting for the resulting clamor to die down before continuing.

“They did what?!”

“Kirihara the Traitor, indeed!”

“How could they betray us?!”

When the commotion settled, Zero added, “While things are admittedly in the early stages, I also see opportunity in the Special Zone.”

His words, in contrast, were met with stunned silence.

“If we have a role in _how_ the Special Zone works, then we can ensure the best outcomes for the Japanese people,” Zero said. “I’ve already made contact with Princess Euphemia, and she has agreed. Her intentions, at the very least, are genuine.”

Ohgi smiled, looking relieved. “So we’ll support the Special Zone.”

“Yes,” Zero confirmed, spreading his arms wide. “We’ll have a foothold to make sure guarantees are met. There might come a time when Britannia—not Euphemia—tries to take away our rights, but we’ll prepare for that possibility and in the meantime make the Special Zone as successful as possible.”

The Black Knights stared at him, looking unsure of how to react.

“Furthermore,” Zero said, opening a channel on the monitor. “We have a new ally.”

Suzaku’s face flickered into view on the screen. “Hello, everyone.”

Tamaki scowled and shook his fist in Suzaku’s direction. “Kururugi?! Man, traitors everywhere…”

Zero turned his masked face towards Tamaki for an ominous moment. “Kururugi will assist us in preparing for the Special Zone. Even though he is not her knight, he can still relay our messages to Princess Euphemia.”

“I’m willing to do whatever it takes to make the Special Zone work for the Japanese people,” Suzaku said solemnly. “I know we’ve fought in the past, but I want you to know that I consider that behind us now. I want to work with you to make a bright future.”

Tohdoh pushed his way to the front of the crowd. “And your goal to make the Britannian system better from within?”

Suzaku cracked a smile. “The Special Zone is kind of proof of that, isn’t it? Along with being a boon granted due to your resistance efforts. It’s evidence of both my way and Zero’s way _together_ resulting in a better outcome.”

“What did you have to do with it?” Ohgi asked. “You weren’t even Princess Euphemia’s knight in the end.”

Suzaku laughed. “No, I chose a different dream.” A beyond-fond look crossed his face as he glanced towards Zero.

The Black Knights murmured amongst themselves, glancing between Suzaku and Zero with raised eyebrows and chuckles.

“Does he have the hots for Zero?” Tamaki stage-whispered. “No way…”

Suzaku laughed again, looking a little pink in the face, before hurriedly changing the subject. “Look, I might not have been her knight, but Princess Euphemia is still my friend and knowing me did influence her. She is unlike most Britannians. She even renounced her claim to the throne as she moves forward with the Special Zone plans.”

“She did what?” Kallen asked, her eyes wide.

Suzaku did a double-take. “Wait, is that you, Kallen?”

“I’m Kozuki Kallen,” she responded. “I’m Japanese!”

“That’s awesome,” Suzaku said, his voice full of feeling. “I’m so glad to get to know the real you.”

“So Princess Euphemia is serious,” Tohdoh mused, bringing everyone back to the main point. “And with our help, the Special Zone will flourish. Is that what you’re saying?”

“Yes.” Suzaku’s voice was firm. “I know you have your concerns, but we’ll address each one until you’re satisfied. Zero and I have already agreed to compromise when necessary, and we’ve been working things out between us ever since we teamed up to take down the Kyushu base.”

Diethard tilted his head. “So that’s how he solved the Kururugi issue.”

Shooting Diethard a glare, Tohdoh turned back to Suzaku. “I look forward to working with you again, Suzaku.”

Lelouch smiled behind the mask.

-+-

That night, Lelouch discussed Geass in long and honest detail with Suzaku.

-+-

“You two are absolutely adorable,” Euphy teased, walking in on Lelouch and Suzaku mid-kiss.

Lelouch bit back a squeak and hurriedly replaced his mask. “We are not,” he protested, his words echoing in Zero’s distorted voice.

Euphy laughed. “I’d like to remind you that I won last time, and I’ll win this argument, too. You two are beyond cute, and that’s all there is to it. Now come on. Cornelia and Schneizel are here to check on how the Special Zone is going.”

Zero huffed and labored to his feet, annoyed that he had to stop making out with his beloved boyfriend. “Fine, fine.”

Suzaku smoothed out his clothes, prompting Lelouch to do the same. His Zero costume, he’d found, could get so wrinkly from _moments_ spent in Suzaku’s embrace.

“I thought we could go for a tour,” Euphy was saying when Lelouch tuned back into the current matter. “And don’t worry, Nunnally is safe and hidden.”

Following his half-sister, Lelouch grabbed Suzaku’s hand, squeezed it, and let go right before they rounded the corner to meet Cornelia and Schneizel. “Greetings.”

“My, my,” Schneizel said with a quirked eyebrow. “ _The_ Zero. I’m flattered.”

“Don’t say things like that!” Cornelia hissed. “It’s bad enough Euphy’s accepted him.”

“But he has agreed to stop stirring up civil unrest in Area 11,” Schneizel pointed out. “Besides, what this man has achieved with his rebellion is nothing short of admirable.”

Zero dipped his head in a show of respect. “I graciously thank you, Your Highness. However, it was with your approval that we were able to get the Special Zone of Japan off the ground. I’m certain that within the agreed-upon time limit, we’ll have proven why we should expand the Zone to cover…”

“This is ridiculous,” Cornelia growled under her breath as they toured the now-operational Zone. “Granting rewards to terrorists—”

“I’d like to reiterate that the Black Knights are working peacefully within the Zone,” Zero reminded her curtly, itching to grab Suzaku’s hand for reassurance. It had taken some time for the Black Knights to accept how serious Euphy truly was about giving the Japanese their country back—even if it had to be done in stages.

Zero smiled behind his mask. The best part was that the Special Zone allowed him and Suzaku to be together. Suzaku was no longer a source of division within the Black Knights now that they were all on the same side of the Special Zone. Problem, solved.

Schneizel complimented their efforts.

For a second, Lelouch found himself lost for words. It was odd, talking to his long-lost siblings—even though they were unaware of his true identity.

“Yes, let’s look to what is working well in the present,” Schneizel said as they returned to the stadium headquarters. “The steps towards the birth of this Zone were multifaceted on all accounts, and it seems to be going well now. I see no reason to stir up old arguments.” He paused, looking thoughtful. “Zero, I don’t suppose a man of your intellect would fancy a game of chess?”

Zero briefly dipped his head. “…I accept.”

“Very well then,” Schneizel said, beckoning over a Britannian soldier holding a packed chessboard. “I always come prepared.”

“Yes, I’m aware of that,” Zero said with a deep chuckle. “Your reputation precedes you.” Leading Schneizel to an open conference room table, he sat down and mentally prepared himself for the challenge of a lifetime. They were five moves into the game before Schneizel managed to surprise him.

“It’s funny. I haven’t felt so invested in a game since I last played my protégé younger brother.”

Zero’s gloved fingers slipped on the black king chess piece. “Excuse me?”

Schneizel smiled, looking almost wistful. “His name was Lelouch. He died in Area 11 during the war.”

Zero bowed his head. “I’m…sorry for your loss.”

Schneizel waved him off. “It was years ago, yet somehow I’m still not over it.”

Lelouch bit his lip, remembered his mother— “I don’t believe the death of a close family member is something you ever get over.”

“You sound like you’ve lost someone as well.”

“Is that so hard to believe?”

“In this world, not at all.”

“What’s going on over here?” Cornelia demanded, followed closely by Euphy. They had been talking quietly amongst themselves off in the corner, catching up, before making their way over to the conference table.

Schneizel smiled again and moved a pawn. “I’m just reminiscing about Lelouch to Zero.”

“You’re talking about our cherished dead brother to the man who _murdered_ our _other_ brother?!” Cornelia snarled, hackles up.

“To be fair, Clovis had just ordered the slaughter of throngs of innocent Japanese civilians,” Zero interjected, capturing Schneizel’s pawn with his king. “But I do understand your rage, Viceroy Cornelia. I’ve felt it myself.”

“You sounds like you’ve found the cure to your rage,” Schneizel noted.

Lelouch’s masked gaze flicked between Euphy and Suzaku. “Indeed.”

“Nothing will ever stop me from wanting vengeance for my dead siblings!” Cornelia hissed. “This land stole the lives of _three_ of them. It is steeped in their blood!”

Lelouch’s heart lurched in his chest. “Your anger towards the Japanese…is it because you associate them with the death of your family? But, the Japanese associate Britannian royalty with the deaths of _their_ families. When will the cycle end?”

“We’re starting to turn it around,” Euphy said, looking firmly around the Zone she’d given up her title for. “The bloodshed ends here.”

“Peace will spread with our example,” Suzaku added, sitting and subtly nudging Lelouch’s ankle with his foot under the table.

Zero sighed, pressing his shin back against Suzaku’s and relishing his warmth. “Yes, that is what we agreed.” It hurt to think that he’d been wrong all these years. He’d thought his siblings hadn’t cared, that they’d believed as their father did, but that didn’t seem to be the case at all.

Maybe his siblings loved him after all. But still, they couldn’t know. Could they?

The chess match ended in a tie.

-+-

“What do you think, Nunnally?” Lelouch asked, removing his mask in his personal quarters. His safety bubble had expanded from Ashford Academy to the entire Special Zone of Japan, but it was still a gilded birdcage—albeit one in which he could live happily. “I was planning on staying in hiding, and maybe revealing ourselves when things were more stable, but…”

Nunnally smiled. “I’m happy being with you, Euphy, and Suzaku. But I must admit, Lelouch, that I do miss Cornelia and Schneizel.”

“Then I’ll reconsider,” Lelouch promised, setting his mask down with a soft clunk.

-+-

“Is this it then?” C.C. asked, biting into a slice of cheese pizza. “Is this the life you wanted?”

Lelouch cocked his head, thinking of the fears and doubts that had plagued him over recent weeks. He then thought of Nunnally and Euphy. Of Suzaku. Of the life they shared together. Of the happiness he’d never thought he’d feel again so deeply, like another summer at the Kururugi Shrine. “It’s different than what I imagined, but in a way…it’s better.”

C.C. nodded, looking around Zero’s business quarters in the Special Zone. “And your Geass?”

“Suzaku understands that it’s for emergencies only.”

A brief frown flashed across C.C.’s face before she looked her normal, apathetic self. “Very well. I might be sticking around for a while then until you fulfill our contract.”

“And what’s that again?” Suzaku asked, walking through the door. It closed behind him with a snap. “Lelouch was a bit vague when we discussed it.”

Lelouch shot Suzaku a grateful smile. At least Suzaku understood.

“Nothing you need to concern yourself with,” C.C. said bluntly.

Suzaku stepped up to Lelouch’s side. “If it affects Lelouch, then it affects me.”

“Isn’t it enough that I’ve been helping Lelouch ever since what happened in Shinjuku? That I’ve endured him pining for you and stressing over the fact that you turned out to be enemies? That I assisted him in piloting the Gawain to save you at the Kyushu base? That I’ve been supportive of your relationship even when some of the Japanese here give you a hard time for being with a Britannian boy?” C.C. wondered, turning her unnerving golden gaze onto Suzaku.

Eyebrows drawing together, Suzaku shook his head. “That’s all well and good, but I still want to know more about Lelouch’s Geass power.”

“You’re concerned about the morality of it?” C.C. asked, cocking her head. “Think of Geass like your gun, Kururugi. It is a tool that can be used for good or ill will.”

“But still—”

“Then you don’t trust Lelouch?”

“I never said that!”

“I know Lelouch has discussed his Geass with you at great length,” C.C. said, biting into another slice of pizza. Cheese dangled down her chin. “He’s gone into excruciating detail about his power restrictions and exactly how he’s used his Geass in the past, has he not?”

“He has, but—"

“You don’t approve of some of the things he’s done with it.”

Suzaku stood taller, his face grim with determination. “I’ve forgiven him for any bad choices he’s made, Geass or no Geass.”

“Then what’s your problem, Kururugi?” C.C. asked.

Suzaku frowned, his eyebrows knitting together. “I want to know how you fit into all this.”

C.C. snorted. “I have a contract with him. When it’s the right time, I’ll ask him to fulfill it. Unfortunately, it’s not the right time yet.”

“Then you’re just going to string him along?” Suzaku demanded, bristling.

Raising an eyebrow, C.C. countered, “I have my reasons, just as you had your reasons for your decisions. Should we delve into those, Kururugi?”

Suzaku gaped at her, his mouth opening and closing wordlessly.

“I mean no harm to Lelouch,” C.C. said, wiping the cheese off her chin. “Whether you believe me or not is your choice. However…”

“Yes?”

“With you in the picture and with how Lelouch is settling for the Special Zone, I’m afraid he will never fulfill our contract. I might need to make a new contract with someone who has a reason to live,” C.C. said, looking resigned. “Don’t worry. I know not to ask you.”

Suzaku’s frown deepened.

Lelouch narrowed his eyes. “Wait, you mean you’re going to cut me loose? Like Mao?”

“If I did,” C.C. explained, “then I’d be doing it for your own good.”

“What if my Geass goes out of control?” Lelouch asked, lightly touching the skin under his left eye.

“You might reach that point if you keep using it,” C.C. admitted, surprising Lelouch with how she gave a straightforward answer for once. “If you want to make sure you don’t end up like Mao, then simply stop using your Geass.”

“I think that’s a great idea,” Suzaku interjected quickly, laying his hand on Lelouch’s shoulder. “Geass sounds like more trouble than it’s worth, honestly.”

Lelouch sighed. “If I use it sparingly…”

“There’s no way to tell when you’ll reach the point of being unable to control your Geass, Lelouch. I would guess you’re close, just based on how much you’ve used it these past few months,” C.C. said. “It is a natural stage of Geass progression. But considering how you have to be in control of everything, even your own power, then…”

She had a point, even though Lelouch didn’t want to admit it. “I see,” he said with a sigh. “Very well then. You did warn me how dangerous this power can be, and since my goals have shifted and I’ve achieved a safe future for myself and my loved ones…”

“Then you no longer need Geass like before,” C.C. finished. “I understand. I will make a new contract. I’ll most likely find someone in the Special Zone, so I’ll be around if you have any more questions or if your Geass changes.”

Lelouch brightened, seeking a silver lining. “Does this mean I’m off the hook about buying your pizzas?”

“I still have your credit cards, so no.”

-+-

Lelouch waited outside the closed door to the stadium conference hall, mask in hand, as he listened in. Euphy and Suzaku stood behind him.

“What the hell does Zero want now?” Cornelia complained loudly.

Schneizel’s smooth, rich tones came immediately. “Even I can’t predict. That man is an enigma.”

Taking a breath, Lelouch donned the mask and entered the room, hearing the others’ footsteps follow in his wake. “I assure you I have a very good reason for summoning you back to the Special Zone.”

“And what would that be?” Cornelia demanded, hands on her hips. Behind her, standing at the ready, Guilford and Darlton loomed.

Letting the suspense dangle for a moment, Zero finally answered. “The last time we were together, we spoke of loss.” Ignoring Schneizel’s and Cornelia’s raised eyebrows, he continued, “When I was nine, I lost my mother. Years later, I also lost a brother—by my own hand.”

“Your own…?” Cornelia echoed, a look of blank horror on her face, as if she couldn’t consider anything more disturbing than killing one’s own sibling.

Zero nodded. “He’d done horrible things and killed many innocents, so at the time I felt justice needed to be served. Now I think there could have been a better way. I’m sorry for what I’ve done.”

“And what does this have to do with us?” Schneizel asked, leaning forward in his seat.

With slight hesitation, Zero answered, “He was your brother, too.”

Cornelia’s eyes widened. “You mean…Clovis?”

“ _Lelouch_?” Schneizel asked, his outburst at almost the exact same moment as he pieced details together.

With a nod, Lelouch removed his mask. “I hope this helps your hearts heal.”

Schneizel blinked in astonishment. “I can’t believe it…”

Cornelia swayed and had to push Guilford away as he tried to support her. “You…killed Clovis?!”

“I know,” Lelouch said, bowing his head. “But I learned my lesson.”

Euphy came forward, laying a hand on Lelouch’s shoulder. “I’ve forgiven Lelouch for everything he’s done, and he has taken steps to try to make the world better.”

Slowly, Cornelia nodded. “I’m going to need some time, Lelouch. I can hardly believe my own eyes. And Nunnally?”

Lelouch smiled. “She’s living with me, Euphy, and Suzaku here in the Special Zone.”

“Why Kururugi?” Schneizel asked, tipping his head to one side.

Smile sharpening to a smirk, Lelouch said airily, “Oh, you know. My boyfriend and I deserve to live together.”

“ _He’s_ your boyfriend?” Cornelia snapped, glaring at Suzaku.

Suzaku ducked his head.

“After all the anguish I dealt with when I thought he was interested in Euphy, and now come to find out he’s _your_ boyfriend?” Cornelia ranted.

Lelouch shook his head, biting back a smile. “You never had to worry with Euphy. Suzaku’s been mine since the beginning.”

“That’s true,” Suzaku piped up, stepping forward to take Lelouch’s hand. “People jump to conclusions far too easily around here.”

“Even so,” Lelouch added, glancing sideways at his boyfriend, “there’s no need to _worry_. Suzaku is a wonderful person.”

“And when Kururugi denied knighthood a couple months back,” Cornelia said, “for the sake of his boyfriend—he was talking about _you_?”

Lelouch threw his head back and laughed. “Guilty.”

“No wonder Kururugi was so vague when I asked him about you,” Schneizel mused, his gaze flicking between their faces. “I was most disappointed that night at dinner.”

“And all this time,” Cornelia went on as if Schneizel had not spoken, clenching and unclenching her fists, “you’ve been Zero _and_ dating Kururugi?!”

“Yes. We worked out our differences,” Lelouch said calmly, dipping his head. “Euphy came along at the right time, but we were prepared to compromise if things continued the way they were.”

“I always knew there was some connection,” Darlton murmured in the background.

Again, Suzaku ducked his head. “Look, I really love Lelouch. I forgive him, too. Just as he’s forgiven me for things I’ve done wrong.”

“Nunnally and I talked,” Lelouch said, “and we agreed that you should know the truth about us. We’d appreciate it if you kept this to yourselves. While I have given up my dream of killing our father to make the Special Zone work, I still have no intention of being connected to him in any way.”

Cornelia gasped. “You planned to kill Father?”

Schneizel slowly nodded. “Understood, Lelouch. You’d be more useful to me as a secret ace up my sleeve anyway.”

“That’s not gonna happen,” Lelouch shot back, stifling the urge to use his Geass on Schneizel. He could not afford to become like Mao, and C.C. hypothesized that he was close. He would have to do this on his own, just as he’d planned to before even knowing Geass existed. “I’m no one’s pawn, Schneizel. I’ve done with that. I’m going to live with Suzaku here in the Special Zone, and be happy. That’s all.”

“But imagine the impact you could have—”

Lelouch frowned. “If you want my help, then ask for it. I might be more generous than you anticipate. But I will not be manipulated. Know that.”

“Very well, Lelouch. I might come to you in the future.”

Lelouch’s lips curved. “I look forward to it.” And indeed he did. He’d enjoyed creating the Black Knights, building them up from a pathetic ragtag group of terrorists. He’d relished the challenge. The Special Zone required maintenance, of course, but it wasn’t the same level of thrill. And as much as he enjoyed his peaceful existence with his loved ones, he also knew the settling boredom would nag at his intellect. With Schneizel’s promise, perhaps his skills as Zero could be polished again.

Lelouch smirked.

Zero would wait.

-+-

It was surreal, watching Cornelia fall over herself to hug Nunnally, while Schneizel knelt by her wheelchair and pressed a loving kiss into her hand. Euphy wriggled her way into a group hug.

Lelouch pulled Suzaku closer as he watched the touching scene play out, his eyes slightly misty.

Suzaku wrapped his arms around Lelouch in turn. “I think you made the right choice,” he murmured.

Lelouch managed a nod. “Thank you.”

This was it. This was his life now.

Maybe he hadn’t gotten done everything he’d planned.

But…

Glancing into Suzaku’s eyes, Lelouch found the truest version of his happiness, mirrored by Suzaku’s own.

It was more than enough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I headcanon that after this, Schneizel comes to Lelouch and Suzaku to request their assistance with the Ragnarok Connection. That is how Lelouch uses his Zero skills and his Geass power again. But since I have a deep loathing for the Ragnarok Connection and making it fit into _Blackmail_ was taxing enough...
> 
> Just let these boys be happy together. That's all I've ever wanted.
> 
> ANYWAY. I hope I made you smile.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope I made you smile. <3


End file.
